Use a Tissue When You Wipe Your Nose
by raebeme
Summary: Kakashi gets sick 7(ish?) days after the brats graduate to genin-hood and all the joys of being on a team. He really didnt think any of this would happen. (Sakura centric)
1. Chapter 1

This, thought Kakashi miserably, was why he stayed away from children, places that had children, and hospitals. This sucked. And he'd only been around the brats the bare minimum of, like, a week tops. One fucking week and this happened. What the hell was his life coming too. Taken out by a cold.

He momentarily wondered if the Kyuubi canceled the effects of vaccinations. Or if Naruto had ever been vaccinated in his entire life. The tiny filthy orange rat probably didn't even know what germs were. This was definitely his fault. Or Sasuke. Kakashi was pretty sure that no one had bothered to actually enforce any sort of rules on the kid. He was probably worse then Naruto now. Maybe. At least even in terms of being a disgusting preteen. Either way it wasn't Sakura carrying the disease that caused this bullshit, she cared far too much about her appearance to avoid personal hygiene. That was why she was Kakashi's favorite little student of all of a week.

Lying in his tiny apartment in his bed he eyed the alarm clock. He was later then intended even, and he wasn't really sure actually getting up and going through the effort of appearing in front of a couple of ungrateful genin would be worth it. Too fucking bad Gai hadn't shown up to issue a challenge that morning Kakashi could have distracted him with unsupervised youths in need of guidance or some bullshit like that. Whatever, eventually the kids would leave or find something to do. Its not like Kakashi was about to send out a messenger to tell… oh actually that was exactly what he could do. The cold was definitely messing with him now.

"Hey. Hey Pakkun. Pakkun get up."

The beautiful pug Pakkun was happily snoring somewhere by Kakashi's feet. And elected to ignore his master by rolling over and snuggling in. Kakashi's bidding could wait another hour. Or month.

Ill with diseases spread by dirty preteens Kakashi kicked Pakkun (gently!) in the side. It wasn't a great move because Pakkun immediately turned the saddest eyes on Kakashi who was a weak weak man. He was also a ninja and knew manipulation when he saw it even if he caved anyways. Oh well it could wait an hour or two he guessed.

"Pakkun you gotta take care of the- the brats."

"Go back to sleep fuck head."

And _that_ , figured Kakashi, was that.

* * *

That was actually the beginning of the largest clusterfuck to hit Konoha since the Uchiha and the Senju had thrown a rager after the founding of the village.

* * *

On a bridge impatiently waiting were the filthy preteens themselves. Kakashi was later then usual and even though they had all shown up late (team 7 was technically assigned a 6am meet time) expecting their sensei to arrive sometime around 10, they were pretty sure this wasn't the standard Kakashi lateness. Well Sakura was pretty sure at least. Naruto was sitting in a heap snoring to her left and a little farther down the bridge Sasuke was staring at the water below them.

At one level Sakura thought he looked dashing gazing off into the distance like that. On a deeper more private level she wondered if he was asleep with his eyes open and if he had somehow mastered standing asleep like a horse.

Sakura quickly looked away before she snorted at the thought. She didn't really want to test the patience of an annoyed Uchiha right now before their sensei had even shown up.

Leaning back against the railing Sakura idly day dreamed about what could be keeping the jounin. Maybe he was preparing to teach them something! Or a mission! Maybe Kakashi-sensei had been called away on a dangerous mission so quickly he couldn't even send word to his precious young genin squad! That was a far better reason then the last fifteen he'd given to explain away his tardiness.

Hours crawled by even slower and Sakura was absolutely positive now, through covert sneaky glances, that Sasuke was part horse and could stand upright and sleep at the same time. It would explain a few things.

Eventually Sakura had taken to sitting on the railing instead of leaning back against it. Her chin was propped up on her hands, elbows resting on her thigh as she slumped over. It was almost noon and Sakura would give it 10 more minutes before either Naruto, who was slowly waking up, or Sasuke left.

Her money was on Sasuke.

If that had been an actual bet with the universe she would have lost.

Naruto rolling up onto his feet stretched his hands to the sky groaning. The noise startled Sasuke who flinched then glowered ferociously at an unaware Naruto.

"Alright I'm outa here." And with that rather simple declaration Naruto turned to leave.

"Yo."

Sakura, closest to the sudden arrival, shrieked and jerked backwards tumbling head over heals off the railing and into the water below. She came up screaming for murder even louder then Naruto who was howling blindly about lateness. Even Sasuke was getting in on the yelling this time.

As Sakura scrambled back to dry land she realized that the noise level had dropped significantly. Faster then it should have. Suspicious she palmed a kunai, unsure what she could actually do in the face of sudden danger but unwilling to go in without a blade. Whatever could make Naruto quiet was obviously something dangerous. (She also had an entire look to avenge from that sudden drop into the water.)

Back on the bridge Naruto and Sasuke gaped at the arrival. Completely floored by the dog in a headband holding up a paw in a mockery of a peace sign. Sakura who appeared behind them plotting murder for her ruined look and mutilated honor (that shriek, the fall – Sasuke had seen all of it) paused at her frozen teammates to actually absorb was she was seeing.

Pakkun grinned a mean doggy grin and set his paw down. He smugly thought that he was already doing a better job then Kakashi was at this whole teaching thing. Sharpening their senses and all that by sudden appearances, expect the unexpected, situational awareness and all that jazz.

"Alright kids listen up Kakashi's busy so I'm in charge. You can call me Pakkun-sama or Pakkun-sensei. Sir also works."

None of the kids look very enthused and the pink one was still holding a knife (poorly, Pakkun could do better and he didn't even have thumbs).

"Holy shit that dogs talking."

This was going to be fun.

* * *

AN: ok diving into the whole Naruto fic have fun following these baby ninja on their adventures ;P


	2. Chapter 2

Sakura dreamed about eating roasted pug that night. Across the village her teammates' subconscious thoughts weren't better off.

Earlier in the day, after Pakkun introduced himself and the genin managed to overcome their shock at finding out some dogs could talk, they'd been hustled to the training grounds. Well, Sasuke had demanded that Pakkun prove he was sent by Kakashi and the dog had dryly asked if Sasuke could prove that he wasn't. That had set Naruto off laughing at Sasuke being burned by a mutt, which Sakura instinctively shoved him for, hissing for Naruto to shut up (Naruto leapt away from her hand with a shriek of protest as Sakura had forgotten about her kunai – not that she actually did any damage). Anyways Sasuke did have a point. So did Pakkun.

In the end they decided that with Kakashi still missing they had nothing better to do and followed the dog.

"Oi. Doggy. What exactly are we doing - missions? Training? Missions and training?!" Naruto was never one for tact… even though he was just the fastest to asking the pressing question now that all three of them had proven to be morons who followed the first person to tell them their sensei sent them.

"It's Pakkun-sama to you. And just training. I don't have the authorization to lead human genin on missions right now." Pakkun glanced over his shoulder and up at the preteens following him as he spoke. What the hell had Kakashi been working on with these kids anyways? Did he have a training plan yet? Was training children like training puppies? Positive encouragement and occasional treats for things especially well done? Probably. If not, Pakkun would figure something else out.

Luckily training ground 3 was close by and they made it without any mishaps. Personally Pakkun didn't see what Kakashi had been complaining about the other day. For the most part these kids seemed fairly standard. A little easy to rile up but they also calmed down fairly quickly. Not the smartest bunch either, which made things easier.

"Right – dump your shit over there and stretch out. We're going for a run to start things off. And tell me what Kakashi's been working on." The kids all groaned but moved to obey, the pink one finally owning up that Kakashi hasn't been doing shit with them.

Sakura's actual phrasing was more along the lines of "Pakkun-sensei, it's only been a week, we've just been doing d-rank missions and a few spars…."

Pakkun, overseeing the team stretch, found them severely lacking. Naruto basically reached for the sky then shook his legs all over the place. Sakura went through the basic catalog from the academy, which was, at best, a supplementary program designed for clan-based students who received a more intense stretching regime at home. Sasuke, as well, stretched the basic academy catalog, though he added a few extra poses for effect. Sakura took notice of that to her own distraction and delight. Naruto basically ignored everything Sasuke was doing to prove a point he'd forgotten to share with the team.

Deeming them ready enough Pakkun spoke up, "As a group we are going to the top of the Hokage Monument. First one there gets a prize."

As one, the three 12-year-olds whipped their heads in the direction of the mountain then back to the dog as if wondering if he had lost his mind. (It was only a few kilometers from their current position and only if they passed through a small portion of the orphan slums.) Then hell broke loose as they all began protesting over one another.

"That's so far! How would be make that run?"

"You want us to do what, doggy? That's dumb! Why not something cool like a justu!"

"Shut up idiot," Sasuke's protest was basically just a mental complaint that this wasn't real training and despair over listening to a dog.

Pakkun was not entirely expecting the protest and stared at the kids for a second then copied their earlier glance at the monument and back. "That's…. Eventually you're going to be expected to run across entire countries. Get up and start running before I take a bite out of you!"

Mid-sentence, Pakkun more or less decided that violent encouragement was needed and growled at the children before leaping (slowly even) at the orange one. Naruto, shrieking, stumbled away from the suddenly scary dog and promptly decided that running to the monument was the better part of valor and took off.

Sasuke who wasn't about to not be first to the monument followed a second later, catching up to Naruto's messy stride and overtaking him in their dash.

Sakura's faint "wait for-" died on her breath as she scrambled after her teammates.

Pakkun followed easily behind Sakura, snapping at her heels before calling up for her to "catch up to your team, kid!"

Ahead of her Naruto and Sasuke left the training grounds and dashed in a more or less straight line towards the monument. Which took them through a fairly crowded market in the orphan slums (officially known as the Sapling District a 6 block residential area, mostly populated by refugees, the children of refugees, lower income civilians, and orphaned ninja). Tents and lean-to and carts and street venders were larger and easier to avoid obstacles, the crowd being a solid mix of ninja and civilian was a little harder to predict.

While Sasuke and Naruto charged into the urban jungle without hesitation, Sakura slowed her pace and scampered up a near by fire escape to the roof of a row of townhouses. It would take her nearly half a block before she would be forced to find an alternative route.

Still at Sakura's heels, Pakkun asked, "Did you forget about staying with your team?"

"NO! They – Forgot – ME!" already panting Sakura ran on over the flat roofs. At then end of the row she managed the leap from the roof to a balcony on apartment building. It was more difficult than the obstacle courses at the Academy. Pausing to catch her breath she glanced at the pug who seemed to be considering something.

"Sakura get back to the ground and keep going. I'm going to fetch your team." Sakura huffed that the dog made a dog pun and made short work of climbing down the side of the building a balcony at a time.

* * *

Meanwhile Sasuke and Naruto had been stopped by a chunin on guard rotation who wrote them each a citation for disturbing the peace, complete with a court date for public shaming (they would be forced to watch a three-hour educational video on why disturbing the peace of a public market was highly discouraged, with heavily implied dialog that they failed at being sneaky ninja for being caught and that's really why they are forced to watch this movie).

As soon as the chunin let them go the boys began their wild dash again, slightly more aware of their surroundings than before. That didn't stop them from tripping over each other when Pakkun appeared in their path.

"You forgot something kids," Pakkun growled at the genin. Naruto and Sasuke eyed each other equally confused before Naruto suddenly gasped.

"Sakura! Where is she - did you eat her?!"

"She was probably too slow to keep up dumbass," Sasuke said to cover up the fact he completely forgot they were supposed to run as a team.

"Hey, shaddup, asshole, at least I remembered her!" (Never mind that Naruto also forgot about her.)

Pakkun rolled his doggy eyes and growled low at the preteens, "Find her or be punished!" and leapt at them (again, slowly, but he really would bite them this time) to get them moving. For all their efforts Sasuke got a chomp on his left ankle and Naruto a bite to the calf.

Naruto practically screeched out "how are we suppose to find her?" while Sasuke snarled and threw a kunai at the dog. The chunin guard from earlier looked in his direction and started over to write another citation for the prohibited use of weapons in a civilian marketplace (complete with an entirely different educational video on the merits of not getting caught using knives in public). Sasuke saw her coming and grabbed Naruto and took off faster then before. The chunnin watched them go then wrote down the citation with the full intention of mailing it anyways as the ninken were always very helpful in providing the names of commanding officers and squad assignments.

* * *

Sakura had continued on her way to the monument. She had slowed to a steady jog through the busier crowds and had found a few emptier side roads to make the run a little easier. By the time she got to the base of the mountain she was drenched in sweat and her teammates nowhere to be found. Probably for the best, she didn't want Sasuke to see her like this.

She wondered if she was supposes to climb to the top or not, and if there was a better way than the thousands of zigzagging stairs.

"Saku - RAAAAAAA! RUN!"

Abruptly Naruto and Sasuke zoomed past her with the former grabbing her wrist and nearly jerking her off her feet as he dragged her up the stairs. Behind her it sounded like an entire pack of dogs was on the hunt baying at found prey. A risky glance over her shoulder told her that was exactly the case… with Pakkun was leading the charge. She tripped over one of the stairs, ripping her wrist free of Naruto's death grip to catch her fall on the stairs in front of her, scraping her palm open.

Suddenly Sasuke was in front of her grabbing her arm and pulling her upright while yelling at Naruto to grab her other arm. She squawked as she was practically lifted off her feet by her teammates as they carried her up a few stairs. Behind them the barking got even louder and even more frightening.

The largest of the dogs was suddenly in front of them blocking the path and Pakkun was sitting on top of of the other dog's head. (Sakura vaguely noted that neither Sasuke or Naruto looked surprised by a dog riding another dog and wondered what the hell they had gotten up to in the last hour.)

"Run as a group or don't run at all," Pakkun barked, which meant something to the boys as they set Sakura back on her own two feet and released her arms. She was pretty sure there would be bruising in the shape of fingers by tomorrow where Sasuke had grabbed her. She could feel the hot breath of the dogs at her back and her teammates pressing close on either side. The boys looked mutinous and frightened at the same time. Pakkun and the large dog weren't doing anything to stop them from running and her brief respite at the bottom of the stairs had allowed her to get her second wind. Making eye contact with the pug she nodded in understanding and started up the stairs, under her own power this time. The two dogs moved out of her direct path and, though she didn't look back, she was sure the boys had edged past the dogs before catching up to her.

The barking started up again and the boys quickly overtook her pace. A particularly ferocious snarl had both boys slowing down to match pace with their slower teammate. By the top, Sakura's legs were shaking and she was vaguely ashamed that both her teammates seemed ready to continue as if the run had only winded them and not wiped their stamina like it had for her.

She hadn't really noticed as they climbed that the barking had calmed down or how the oppressive fear of teeth and claws and hunters at her back had faded until it was completely gone and the dogs, eight of them she realized, spread out around the genin panting happily. One of them was wearing sunglasses.

"That was terrible. Sakura, meet the pack. Your teammates met them earlier. Also, everyone gets a prize for making it to the top. Pick a dog and start doing some ear rubs."


	3. Chapter 3

The day after team 7 met Pakkun and ran across the village and back to training ground 3 (after ear rubs), they met up for the first time in days actually on time, at 6 in the morning. Pakkun and the horde of dogs, about which none of the kids managed to ask, sent the genin on a run to the monument and around again. The children, too tired to really complain, wondered what happened to their elusive teacher. They still listened to the dog though. (Because teeth.)

 _Kakashi, in his little apartment, tried to remember what day it was and where his dogs went before downing some cold meds and going back to sleep._

The preteens spent the day running around the village being chased by dogs or doing the chasing. (Sakura guessed the dogs were summons, Naruto figured they were talking pets that Kakashi needed an excuse to have, and Sasuke only noted they were better at this whole team thing than Kakashi had been. Sakura and Naruto agreed with that, even if Pakkun made them run and run and run.)

While none of the members of team 7 knew this at the time, they were supposed to be assigned their first C-rank mission that day. Because Kakashi was currently indisposed and the genin were under the supervision of a dog, the mission desk marked the team for temporary inactivity and the previously selected mission was passed to the chunin corps for re-assignment. (A team of chunin for a c-rank escort mission usually cost the same as one jounin and the three genin to tag along for training.)

Later that day, after the chunin and genin corps received their assignments, a team of three (two recent promotions and an older shinobi slowly retiring down the ranks) left through the village gates to escort the bridge builder back to the Land of Waves roughly the same time the genin of team 7 made it to the top of the Hokage Monument for the third time in as many hours.

The farther the chunin team got from the village the more certain they were that something on this mission wasn't as it seemed. Typically escort missions of this caliber were handled by young genin teams and their jounin-sensei and if there wasn't one available, it would be handed off to the corps to deal with. This one was especially low rank and at worst, the team captain assumed, they might face an especially brave rabbit or something equally ridiculous. But as they traveled farther from the Hidden Village, the jumpier their client, a drunk who berated the team every step of the way, became.

 _In Konoha Kakashi still hadn't woken up from his cold medicine-induced snooze fest._

Nearing midnight one of the chunin (a younger, recent promotion) stumbled towards the village gates before, to the alarm of the night guard, collapsing. No one was sure how she had made it all the way back to the Village proper without encountering any of the patrols and that was even more alarming than a young woman bloody and dying. As the guard called for back up, a general alert went out to tighten up security and find the hole one of their own had fallen through.

 _Sasuke in his large and empty apartment, far from the gates, stared up at the ceiling unable to sleep._

It took hours of surgery (she had lacerations to the lower abdomen, a stab wound through her left shoulder, and a fairly large chunk of muscle had been torn away from her lower right leg on top of severe chakra exhaustion and blood loss) before she was stable enough to be moved to a room.

 _Naruto rolled off his bed and thumped to the ground, never waking for a moment. His neighbor did, though, and sent another complaint to the building's super about that damn brat upstairs making a racket in the middle of the night._

The chunin, officially identified as Fujita Mai, had been sent out earlier with teammates Nomura Sano and Yoshida Maemi (both MIA) was awoken by the corps commander for a debriefing. Mai warbled out that her team was dead, the client was dead, and that someone by the name of Gato had commissioned the strike. The chunin commander patted Mai's shoulder and told her to go back to sleep and that they would alert the Hokage to the situation.

 _Sakura woke up to shower and make breakfast for herself, sparing plenty of time to make her way to the bridge to begin running again with the boys, the pack at their heels._

By 0600 hours, the Hokage had sent out messengers and assembled a team of jounin: Maito Gai (training with his genin team), Hatake Kakashi (asleep in his apartment - nearly stabbed the messenger), and Shiranui Genma (also asleep - did not try to stab the messenger). The team was to deal with the sudden threat that had killed two chunin of the leaf and acquire monetary reparations for assists lost in the line of duty on assignment commissioned under false pretense. _Basically_ , Kakashi summarized to himself as he struggled not to sniff under his mask, _Wave was fucked and so's this Gato guy._

Dismissed from the Third Hokage's office, Kakashi went off in search of his team (and dogs) while the other jounin peeled off to handle their own affairs. (Gai loudly yelled that he could find his own genin _and_ pack _and_ be at the gate before Kakashi. With such a challenge issued, there was no time to waste.)

He found the brats running across a string of connected balconies just outside one of the slum districts. Landing in front of the kids, he grinned at them under his mask. "Yo."

Naruto, leading the charge, slid to a stop to point wildly at the jounin, yelling, "Kaka-sensei! Late!"

Sasuke who hadn't slowed down a bit, slammed directly into Naruto's back while Sakura managed to grab ahold of the railing to stop her leap into the balcony the boys were now laying in. Like two book ends Sakura copied Kakashi's low crouch on the opposite railing to peer down at the boys.

"Kakashi-sensei, it's been three days," Sakura deadpanned glancing up at him. Had it? He didn't remember being sick for so long. Maybe that's why the pack was chasing his genin across the village. He usually wanted to too after three days with them. (He was also pretty sure he had only spent three days around them max so it worked out.)

The dogs (now that he was thinking about it, he had a faint memory of telling Pakkun something about the kids but he thought he dreamt that) bounded past her, stepping on Naruto and Sasuke trying to get up, calling out, "Boss! Boss!" "Run with us?" "Come on, its fun!"

"Hmm. Sounds fun. Can't, got a mission."

The dogs whined at that, tails not slowing a bit. Naruto shot up, knocking Sasuke back down. "Ow, asshole," the Uchiha hissed at the blond.

"A mission?! Where are we going!?" Ten sets of eyes and one pair of sunglasses loomed close demanding answers.

"Not-"

Before Kakashi could explain, the sliding door to the balcony snapped open and an incredibly angry old man yelled at the team to get off his porch and threw what seemed to be the trash of a weapons collection, old and rusty and useless, at them.

Sliding to ground level, Kakashi, surrounded by dogs, called up to the kids who weren't as dexterous yet to leap down five stories. "Not you - just me. Do what Pakkun says. Train hard. Ok, I think that's it. Bye-bye. See you when I get back."

With a jaunty wave, he vanished. The yelling of jilted students was continuously hilarious. Kakashi also didn't think there was anything left to say (and he really had to blow his nose and didn't want an audience for that). It wasn't like the team had been together long enough to really do anything yet. No need to get emotional or anything. Besides, it wasn't like a team of fresh-faced, rank genin could get in that much trouble. So why worry about laying out some ground rules?

Actually, no he was positive those morons would get in trouble eventually (he was currently unaware of the mounting public disobediance citations that would eventually affect his pay as a jounin sensei). At his apartment, Kakashi quickly jotted down a list of rules for Pakkun to relay to the team while he grabbed his travel kit. He refrained from writing the list on a used tissue and instead scrounged up a faded receipt to scribble on, after he found a pen that actually worked.

 _-Listen to Pakkun he's smarter than all of you_

 _-Don't eat expired food_

 _-Train - lots_

 _-Do missions_

 _-Pakkun's in charge Stay out of trouble dont get caught_

There. That about covered it. He quickly signed the heno-heno-moheji at the bottom and left it on the table.

Time to go, he had a gangster to murder and money to steal.

On his way out the door Kakashi swung back around to grab some extra cold meds because his sinuses hurt.

He had to turn back a second time and retrieve the note he'd left for Pakkun. It was unlikely the dogs would notice it. On his way to the gates he folded the note into a paper airplane that he threw at Sakura as he passed the training grounds (it hit her in the face). (This week really wasn't working out for her and her cool image she was trying to portray. She vowed revenge.)

He won the challenge.

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke both flinched and momentarily forgot what they had been arguing about when Sakura screamed and leapt up, throwing a kunai at a bush. In her hand she was holding a crumpled paper airplane. Shoulders shaking in anger, she smoothed out the paper to revel a receipt for doggy toothpaste. The boys edged closer to get a look at it.

"Whatcha got, Sakura?"

Wordlessly Sakura held it out to Naruto, who blinked down at it quietly whispering "what the fuck" to himself. Sasuke leaned over to look and snatched it from Naruto's hands, flipping it over. "Kakashi sent this. He wants us to do missions."

The pack, who had been lounging in the sunbeams, perked up at the name. Pakkun called out to the genin, "Who's in charge?"

The preteens, now crowded around each other to get a better glimps of the paper, barely even registered the dog's question.

Pointing at the second item on the list, Sakura asked, "Who would eat bad food?"

"Ah…. Who knows… Hey Kakashi says we can prank the village!" Naruto shifted awkwardly before rationalizing that the last point was practically giving them permission to do whatever they wanted.

"He also says we need to train and do missions. It's been three days since we did one - let's go," Sasuke snapped. Turning, he marched off in the direction of the Hokage tower and the mission desk. Time to get paid to do some shit.

Naruto and Sakura shared a glance before trotting after the Uchiha. That was a solid point and Naruto was running low on food money.

The dogs watched the tweens run off before glancing at one another.

"Boss left you in charge," Urusei said.

Pakkun snapped his teeth at Urushi. He knew that already. Poor idiots already forgot that they couldn't do missions at the moment without first getting a metric ton of paperwork out of the way. He sighed and moved to follow the kids while ignoring the jeers from the pack. Just wait, they would get sucked into the d-ranks soon enough.

* * *

At the mission desk Sasuke jumped the line and stalked right up to the chunin on duty, who didn't even bat an eye at the kid. Drawly, the chunin prompted him after an uncomfortable amount of time passed and it became clear that Sasuke's plan did not include actually speaking. "Yeah?"

Realizing that words needed to happen, since the chunin clearly didn't understand that only ninja in need of a mission came to the mission desk, Sasuke glanced around for one of his more outspoken teammates. They were at the back of the room completely taken aback by this entire scene and far too mortified to come to the rescue at this point (Sakura was at least – Naruto was practically crying into his jumpsuit as he laughed). Sasuke was on his own. That was fine, he was used to it.

"Team 7 reporting for assignment," Sasuke said in his most official and commanding voice. There, that was pretty close to what Kakashi had done the last time they had gotten a mission. (Kakashi had actually walked in said "yo" and caught a scroll that was tossed at him.)

The chunin, Hagane Kotetsu according to the name plate, made a show of glancing around before turning his gaze back to the Uchiha. "Don't see your sensei anywhere." No genin team who hadn't been inducted into the genin corps was allowed on missions without a jounin-sensei or special permission from said sensei.

Sakura, increasingly humiliated by this exchange saw the opening and took it. Grabbing both Naruto and Pakkun (who had arrived in time to watch the show) she approached the desk. "Uhm. Sir? Our sensei left a note saying Pakkun," she gestured at the dog, "would lead us on missions."

"….Right." A vicious elbow from Naruto reminded Sasuke that he currently held the note, which he offered to Kotetsu (who was studiously avoiding eye contact with another snickering chunin farther down the desk). "This is a receipt for toothpaste… for dogs."

"Ugh! It's on the back, dumbass!" Naruto regaining speech delicately let the occupants of the next building over know about his frustrations.

Flipping the receipt over Kotetsu hummed thinking it over. Making a decision he handed it back to the kids.

"Alright, this isn't enough, you're gonna to need the Ninken & Summon Mission Leaders Qualification application filled out and turned in before I can give you a mission."

"Thank you very much!" Grabbing the back of Naruto's shirt and Pakkun again, Sakura made a break for it, trusting that Sasuke would follow her out.

Outside of the office the team could faintly hear muffled laugher. Sakura did not slow down at all.

"Soooooooo…. Where we goin', Sakura-chan?" Naruto (still being dragged along by his shirt) asked, twisting around enough to keep his feet.

Releasing her teammate and dropping the dog, Sakura, without breaking stride, promptly replied, "The library."

"What?! Why?"

"That's stupid."

Individually, the boys conveyed how much they did not want to go into the library. Pakkun just continued along next to Sakura and, without looking back at the boys (who had stopped walking in affront), casually said, "Well, you can always run to the top of the monument again. Double speed this time."

An uneasy glance was shared before the boys followed their pink teammate into the building. Conveniently, the particular library Sakura headed for was next door to the Hokage tower so they didn't have to travel too far. She, apparently, knew exactly where she was going and aimed for the back of the building to the help desk where an older woman was sitting. She didn't even glance up at the girl before asking for identification.

"Haruno Sakura. Genin, team 7, registration 012601." Sakura gestured for her teammates to follow her lead.

Sighing in annoyance, Sasuke did as requested while Naruto dug through his weapons pouch for his identification card.

"Uchiha Sasuke, genin team 7, oh-one-two-six-oh-six." He said it like it was a rhyme as if he had practiced it in front of a mirror until it had developed its own rhythm that had to be carefully enunciated every time he spoke.

Naruto reading off a crumpled card stuttered through his own identification. "Zero, one, two, six..? Wait yeah six, zero… uh seven. Uzumaki Naruto! Remember it, lady!" The librarian finally glanced up at that to give Naruto the stink eye.

Pakkun pretended to be a dog that couldn't speak and panted with a fake doggy grin next to Sakura.

"Uhm we are looking for team leader registration forms?" Sakura tried to distract the librarian from Naruto who was sticking his tongue out at her now. The woman, keeping one eye on Naruto, directed them to a stack of filing cabinets off to the left.

"Hey, Sakura-chan? How does she know we are who we say we are? She didn't check any files or nothin'." Naruto's stage whisper echoed across the library.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and answered instead, "They don't care, moron, genin can't look at restricted stuff anyways."

"Yeah, Naruto. It's like practice for when we advance or get promoted."

"Plus there's the seals," Pakkun cut in. The kids all paused to look down at the dog. "Yeah, it's linked to the current shinobi logs and when you give your ID it tells the librarian if it's true or not. Pretty standard stuff." It didn't sound standard to the genin, whose only experience with seals were minor explosive tags and inexpensive storage scrolls. There were a lot of seals in the Uzuhio district though, maybe Sakura would ask her family about it later.

Reaching the files, the kids spread out to look for the one particular application, which quickly led to Sakura telling Naruto (and politely asking Sasuke) to find a table while she got the forms. Pakkun was no help, too short to see into the cabinets and unwilling to prove he wasn't actually an unintelligent, highly trained ninken to the woman keeping a careful eye on the team from behind her desk.

By the time the kids actually got to filling in the paperwork it became increasingly obvious that the only one in their element at the library completing paperwork was Sakura. Sasuke wasn't paying attention and Naruto was attempting to doodle on the margins of the application as Sakura filled them out. Pakkun was sitting in the chair next to Sakura quietly answering questions as she wrote them down.

"Oh no. It says that Kaka-sensei needs to sign this for authorization…" Sakura, realizing she had filled in 10 pages of work for nothing, moped down at the page. Naruto groaned and thumped his head down onto the table. Sasuke was probably napping again judging by his lack of reaction. (Sakura wondered if the boy got enough sleep and quietly vowed to do something extra nice for him later.)

Pakkun eyeing the papers and cleared his throat to say, "Technically an apprentice and a team captain can sign in absentee of the jounin-sensei…"

Naruto, cheek pressed against the table, glowered at the dog. "How d'you know all that and what happened to the last genin team you led anyways?"

Struck by how astute that line of questioning actually was, Sakura also turned to look at the dog who only shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Nothing permanent. No one died or anything," which didn't set anyone's minds at ease or actually answer the question.

Whatever, Sakura shook her head as Naruto took it upon himself to explain why that wasn't helpful and went looking for the apprenticeship applications, team captain form, and squad qualifications. Best to be prepared.

By the time all the paperwork had been completed the team had held two votes (one for team captain and one to kick Naruto off the squad), had a minor conniption over who would sign as Kakashi's apprentice (they finally agreed that all of them would sign and filled out separate apprenticeship applications that would be reviewed by their jounin-sensei upon his return from his mission and temporarily counted as complete until he did so), and realized that they needed to get the documents notarized. Luckily the librarian was willing to help out for the low low price of all their pocket money and a contract written for the complete mission pay of their first c-rank also notarized and signed (her name, it turned, out was Ogawa Yasuo and when Sasuke tried to hold out on her, she bared her teeth - most of which had been filed into points - and asked him to think again).

* * *

When team captaincy became an issue Naruto immediately put forth his name loudly. "Imma vote for myself! Uzumaki Naruto!"

"Oh my god, Naruto, you're gonna get us kicked out, be quiet!" Sakura was quick to shut him down as the librarian shot them the hairy eyeball from her desk. (They hadn't known about the teeth yet.)

Sasuke cut in with a low "I vote for myself." He didn't want to be squad captain but his teammates were idiots so it would probably work out for the best if he was in charge. (He also decided that his blunder earlier at the mission desk wouldn't happen again and that he would use his soon-to-be powers of authority to delegate someone else to do the talking.)

"O-oh Sasuke-kun… uhm well I… vote for myself too!" Sakura didn't want to be the only one who didn't vote for themself which put the team exactly where they started in the first place.

"I vote for Sakura. And so does Kakashi," Pakkun put in.

"HEY, you don't get a vote!"

"I vote we get rid of Naruto." If Sasuke wasn't going to be captain he was going to make the most of the temporary democracy and get rid of at least one annoyance.

"I second that."

"Thirded and fourthed."

"Fuck all of you."

* * *

AN: THATS RIGHT I SKIPPED THE WAVE ARC HAHAHAHA but fore real fuck the wave arc. this way we got no magic eyeballs yet no "oh look a girl is better then you" bs no scary fox chakra. just a bunch of kids and a talking dog


	4. Chapter 4

It took two whole days for the paperwork to process and in that time Sakura and Sasuke got an up-close and personal look at Naruto's daily life. Because he somehow got evicted. She's still not sure how that happened, to be perfectly honest, but she also had to sit through multiple loud retellings of what went down.

Supposedly the village provided for all orphans with the expectation they would enter the academy and either join the military upon graduation or, if they washed out, would work as non-combatant support staff for the village. Which was standard, all academy applicants signed a decade of their life to the village in return for training, the orphans just gave a little more. Apparently that village stipend ended when Naruto became a genin as he was expected to pay his own way. Which would have worked if they had continued to take missions as frequently as possible – and not given all their pocket money to an old lady with shark teeth.

Instead, team 7 hadn't taken a single mission in four days, and when Naruto returned home that night it was to the locks changed and most of his belongings in the street. The building's super cited noise complaints and late rent as the reason and told Naruto to get lost. And Naruto, not knowing what to do, had grabbed all he owned with a multitude of clones and gone to Sasuke's apartment.

He didn't know where Sakura lived otherwise he might have gone there first. She was smart and might have known what to do.

Sasuke, who hadn't been sleeping, opened the door when Naruto banged on it a few times, snarling, "What? I was asleep. Go away."

"Ahhhh… yeah, can I sleep here?"

"No," Sasuke said slamming the door in Naruto's face. Or tried to at least. Naruto managed to squeeze an arm through the gap and keep the door from shutting properly. He practically oozed through the door, wailing at Sasuke that teams needed to stick together.

A little while later, Naruto was sitting at a low table in Sasuke's living room, all of his belongings piled up around the entrance. Sasuke, who had no interest in receiving guests, did not offer Naruto anything to drink and Naruto, who had never been a guest in anyone's home in his entire life, did not notice the slight.

Glaring at each other, the silence echoed uncomfortably. Before Sasuke sighed and relented.

"Don't eat or touch anything. This is for tonight. Only." And he then disappeared into his bedroom firmly closing and locking the door. Naruto huffed, and stuck his tongue out at the closed door but kept his comments to himself before rolling out his mission bedroll (never before used by Naruto! Certified preowned by someone else!).

* * *

It did not in fact occur to Naruto to ask Iruka-sensei for a place to stay that night or the following day, but it did occur to Sakura when Sasuke appeared the next morning with Naruto in tow for their now-daily running of the hounds.

"Wait so…. You were evicted? It hasn't been two weeks since graduation!"

Sakura was huffing and puffing as she ran up the stairs while Naruto took them two or three at a time. Sasuke was doing knee to chest lifts each step; Sakura wondered if he knew he looked like a crane every time he did that. (Sasuke did not know what he looked like but did know he was bored staying in stride with Sakura, but last time he'd tried to leave her behind on the stairs, Bull had sat on him for half an hour.)

"Yeah I dunno I stayed with chicken legs last night," Naruto said jerking his thumb at Sasuke. (So it wasn't just Sakura that saw it.) "Anyways, don't know what to do now, 'm outa money…"

Sakura was silent for the rest of the trip up the mountain. The dogs were fairly sedated today too, and the boys weren't going at it like usual. (She also tried to pick up her pace about halfway up and couldn't pull in enough air to actually speak the rest of the climb.)

After she'd caught her breath, Sakura brought up the idea of staying with Iruka-sensei who was known for letting academy students stay with him when they had no one at home or nowhere to go.

Naruto rubbing the back of his head laughed it off. "I mean maybe but I never stayed with him in the academy so I don't wanna get in the way…"

"You were in my way idiot."

Valiantly ignoring Sasuke (it's for your own good, Sakura cried out in her head) Sakura glanced down at Pakkun who had also been listening all morning while the boys complained. The dog shrugged, he'd never had to worry about leases or housing or even buying kibble, Kakashi took care of all that – he usually followed the list and bought the correct shampoo even. Actually, that made him think of something.

"Do you at least have the lease?" the pug asked the orange hobo.

"A... lease? Nnnnno? I've lived there since I was 6." Sakura blinked at Naruto flabbergasted. Six? Since he was six? How? That made no sense. Whatever, that meant he was moved there under the Konoha Orphan Public Service and Resources Committee, which meant his lease would be on the books. She could work with that. (Sakura was the child of refugees and every single member of her family actively complained about or fought against the KOP and their latest sanction, the bunch of ruthless thugs.)

Sasuke, suddenly realizing that his silent insults hadn't even been understood that night or morning, kicked a rock at Naruto and nailed him in the face with it.

"Moron."

* * *

By noon, Sakura had managed to drag the boys and Pakkun to the public records archive in the basement of the Hokage tower. After jumping through a few hoops, making Naruto hula dance, and Sasuke threatening to light someone's hair on fire (the hoops and the hula might not have happened but Sasuke really did harass a poor non-com) it turned out that Naruto's lease was in the public record. Completely redacted and completely useless.

"Naruto… what the fuck…"

"Yeah I dunno."

So Sakura set out to talk with the tenant office. This, she swore to herself, would be her extra nice good deed for Sasuke. It couldn't be good for his health and sleep schedule to have Naruto hanging around. Solving such small problems for her idiotic subordinates also helped cement her place as team captain.

Obviously they should all be grateful for her heroic aid in their time of need!

Naruto was of no help at the office as he yelled about how it wasn't fair, while Sasuke lurked and glared in the background, and Pakkun sat at her feet and watched. Occasionally the man Sakura was speaking with, amidst his blustering and yelling, would insult Naruto and the dog would growl dangerously and the man would change his wording mid-breath.

Finally, Sakura had a breakthrough when she asked about the back rent.

"It goes week to week for you ninja. He's missed 'em."

"So if he pays his back rent and keeps up with it, he can have his apartment back? Great!"

Sakura beamed at the super with all the guile of a child. It wasn't going to be that easy but Sakura didn't have much of a back-up plan other than steamrolling the civilian and threatening him with knives (which would result in a citation and personally she wanted to be the only member of team 7 not to receive one).

The man huffs and glances around for an escape, and gladly latches onto the first he finds. "Get out, kids, office is closed or I'll have you fined for trespassing."

It's Sasuke who snaps that they will be back tomorrow to finish this before storming out. Naruto juts his jaw out and nods in agreement before following. Sakura watches them go for a second before turning back to the civilian for one last word, eyeing his desk for a nameplate.

"See you later, Ueda-san. I'm sure that we will reach an agreement. Right, Pakkun-sensei?" Sakura, still smiling, glanced down at the dog who blinked up at her catching on that he hadn't actually spoken the whole time.

"Probably the best outcome, Sakura. Later, Ueda." And with that the two followed the boys leavening a suddenly nervous civilian in their wake.

* * *

The team meandered their way across the village, plotting as they went. To sum it all up they needed to take as many missions as possible as fast as possible, get Naruto out of Sasuke's apartment, and train as often as possible according to the note Kakashi left. Pakkun was available for the first and last of the list but the middle parts were a little stickier.

"Ok, generally rookie genin get the cheapest of the d-ranks… which means we are going to need to pack in a lot in a day to actually make the amount we need… which means that we need to start as soon as the desk opens up for the day… and theoretically we could… hm… yeah that would work…. More paperwork… I bet I could get it in on time… plus training…. We need to do a few hours a day… and we need to eat… sleep is important…" Sakura mumbled mostly to herself.

By this point the boys where headed for Ichiraku while Sakura trailed behind them (Pakkun ditched out earlier with strict orders to meet up at 6am). Sasuke was hungry and was not willing to feed Naruto and if he went home now the idiot would just whine for something to eat there. Maybe he could foist the care and safekeeping of Naruto on Sakura. It'd work out great; she'd kill him within the night.

"Why didn't you go to Sakura's?"

"Uhhh… dun' know where she lives." Naruto scratched at his cheek. Maybe that wasn't very ninja-y of him to not know that but he was pretty sure Sasuke didn't know either (he didn't).

"Hm. Sakura," Sasuke said cutting the rambling girl off. "Where do you live?"

Sakura blinked at Sasuke completely floored. Sasuke was asking her where she lived? Where she lived? Her? Oh no Sasuke was asking her where she lived. Abort, abort.

"Oh! Sasuke-kun! Uhm. I.. Live around here! Yeah. Near by. It's close. To here. That-a-way." She gestured down the street feeling her will to live slowly fading. If she could die here and now, just drop dead that would be great.

"What, really? Sakura-chan! I wanna see your house!" Naruto was not helping.

"Yeah Sakura, let's go." Neither was Sasuke.

What was this gang up on Sakura day? After she was so nice earlier? Hell no she wasn't doing this right now.

"I actually have to go do more paperwork! You know captain stuff! So that – that we can take more missions! And make money! Ok bye!" She promptly turned tail and ran. There was no way she was going to let Sasuke into her house without at least three or four days of prepping. Her parents would embarrass her, the baby pictures needed to be removed from the walls. And Naruto might show up in the middle of the night or something and try and prank her and then she would get arrested for murder and it would be terrible for her sleep schedule.

"I think that was your fault," said Naruto watching the girl scamper up a fire escape. She really liked running up high for some reason.

"Pffttt. Whatever."

* * *

Sakura did follow through on her word of doing even more paperwork for missions, registering the team with the genin corps, and applying for multi team missions as well. Pakkun happily told the kids that each mission could be used as training if they applied themselves correctly and readily encouraged them to take just one more for every mission they completed.

Unfortunately, those missions were generally filthy unthankful work. Hard labor and long hours. The genin cleaned out gutters, weeded gardens, trapped varmints, disposed of the varmints, inspected sewers for any blockages, and caught that goddamn cat at least six times. The sewer system was a mess of elegant strategic thinking and outdated cheap labor techniques. Some of these pipelines predated the founding of the hidden village when the area was only populated by a small market town of a post office, the temple, a brothel, and a few streets of housing. All maps, while technically correct, could not be trusted unquestionably as the sewers were designed for difficult access in order to mislead and waylay invaders who would attempt to seize the city from below. It was frustrating and slow work, and while the lines were regularly prowled by ANBU they were not maintained by the elite. That was a job for the genin corps and recently it was a mission for Team 7. The only upside was Pakkun teaching them a trick with their chakra while traveling through the sewers.

Apparently it was possible to use chakra to stick to walls and ceilings with your feet as if you were walking on flat land. It was very impressive and explained how older shinobi got around so easily. Every child of the leaf knew how to climb, it came fairly quickly after walking here, but the ability to walk up walls was a game changer. For Sakura at least. The boys were having a harder and much more disgusting time learning the new trick.

As she trotted along the wall (her stomach in agony at the new core workout) she listened to the boys screaming at each other, themselves, and the filth behind her. This was the seventh line they had braved that day (and the fifteenth overall) and Pakkun had only shown them how to do this two hours ago.

She was disgusting and smelled like the bowels of a diseased rodent. Her parents might not let her in the house later, if they were even able to complete their missions before the day was over. Her hair was shellacked to her skull despite having pulled it back earlier to keep it out of the way. A shove from Sasuke earlier had sent Naruto careening into her which had caused Sakura to fall off a ledge and into the stagnate pool she had marked down for the secondary team to deal with only moments before. It was after that Pakkun decided to show them how to walk on walls.

She was exhausted, hungry, nauseous from the smell, and wanted nothing more than to crawl into her shower and scrub till the water ran cold. The boys were as unhelpful as always (sorry Sasuke-kun!) and Pakkun was staying firmly out of reach of anyone and frequently made use of the manholes to escape.

As Sakura peered at a crack near the ceiling of the pipeline the boys suddenly stopped making noise. Alarmed she turned to see what had happened to them, mildly hoping Naruto had been eaten by a sewer crocodile. Naruto and Sasuke had continued past her while she inspected the crack for structural damage and had disappeared into the darkness ahead. Dropping down to an easier height to make her way through the lines, Sakura ran after the boys with increasing worry. Palming a knife as she went.

"Sasuke-kun? Naruto? GUYS!"

No one answered her but as she rounded a bend a horrific scream echoed back to her. Panicking, she ran even faster, unknowingly using her new talent of basic chakra manipulation to aid her speed, because that didn't sound good and she didn't know where Pakkun was and maybe a sewer croc was eating them.

She was moving so quickly that in the dim lighting she nearly came unglued to the wall and fell into the drainage basin. Panting, she looked around, feet slipping on the damp concrete. She finally noticed the boys a few levels lower where Sasuke was laying in a heap and Naruto was flitting around him like a bumble bee around a fake flower.

"Hey! What happened?"

"Sakura-chan! Sasuke is dying!" Great, Sakura was here, she could take responsibility for everything since she was team captain now.

Sakura was glad she pulled a knife when she did, hopefully it would come in handy against whatever attacked them.

"I'm not dying, asshole, you broke my leg," Sasuke said trying not to actually look at it. When Sakura got a better glimpse of the boy and his… leg, she lost control of her chakra and slid down the drainage basin into the pool and dropped her kuni into the murk.

Legs were not suppose to look like that. It was rapidly swelling and turning a nasty purple color under all the muck and Sasuke was loosing color in his face. Naruto was dancing around uselessly and Pakkun wasn't here to take charge and Sasuke needed rescuing. It was her time. Sakura's moment. To prove to everyone how incredible she was. How remarkable. How much everyone needed her to save the day.

Climbing out of the pool she grabbed Naruto by the shirt dragging him down to kneeling level with Sasuke.

"We gotta make a splint and get to the hospital. Damn I wish we had mics for this. What happened?"

The boys eyed each other silent as the grave before Naruto croaked out, "Sasuke tried to jump across and fell like the idiot he is." Sasuke, who's strength was sapped by the sight of his leg going two incompatable directions, mustered the reserve to swat at Naruto.

"No! I did not. You distracted me when you fell!" Neither were going to admit that a rat had crawled out of a hole had made direct eye contact with the both of them and lit a cigarette before telling them to piss off. Both of them fell in surprise after Naruto tried to challenge the rat to a duel and slid down the wall into Sasuke who was so bewildered by a talking rat that he lost his footing and fell 25 feet into the basin, causing his leg to strike the safety railing.

They ended up admitting it anyway while yelling at each other about blame.

"You broke my LEG!"

"IT WAS THE RAT!"

"What rat?"

"If YOU hadn't tried to punch it this wouldn't have happened!"

"Yeah well.. It still wasn't my fault! 'Sides you're the one that broke a bone so that just means you ain't that great, huh?"

"…right I'm just going to splint this now, it's gonna hurt."

"You eat my food – break my leg – insult mEEEEEEE FUCK!"

"Ugh gross, it made a noise? Is it suppose to do that?"

"Naruto, lets just get out of here."

Technically this was the fault of shoddy training by dog and an absent sensei and also a talking rat that Sakura determined was hallucinated by the boys after inhaling fumes from the sewer system. (She marked that on the maps for the secondary team to look into as well.) Technically Sakura was team captain and her subordinate got hurt on her watch. Technically Sakura was in for it. Technically she was a legal adult and in the eyes of the law could be treated as such. Technically Sakura had to answer for her team's stupidity.

* * *

The nurses fussed over the last Uchiha as if he was a celebrity, adored by all. The trauma care medic-nin on duty was not as impressed. Setting the leg and healing it as much as hospital regulation allowed, she quizzed down the kids on what happened, making notes in the team and personal files.

"Where's your sensei?" the medic asked.

"He left Pakkun in charge while he went on a mission." Sakura was going to be as professional as possible.

"Yeah, lady Kaka-sensei knows what's up." Naruto wasn't going to be professional because he didn't know what professional was.

"Right. And you're squad captain?" Why the hell were these kids running around and voting on captains so fast. What happened to normal baby ninja who did nothing but yell at each other and their sensei for a few years then got their act together and discovered paperwork?

"Yes ma'am." Oh no Sakura was going to be put down as the responsible party. She couldn't be responsible for anything – she was twelve! – just look at her she was covered in filth what kind of adult was covered in filth even if it was for the mission?

"How many missions have you done in the last two days exactly?" This was the third time the medic asked.

"This was our twelfth." They needed to make money fast and missions were the best option for newly minted assassins looking to make some cash and not get arrested. No need to let the medic in on how many under the table jobs they would be taking in the next few days.

"And your sensei left you under the care of a dog that's not even here." The medic closed her eyes searching for benediction. Why were jounin like this?

"Yeah, we said that lady. And he's a talking dog, get it straight." Naruto had to set the record.

"I need a responsible adult who isn't twelve to take care of you," the medic directed at Sasuke who was prodding at the cast on his leg. It needed to stay on for two weeks while the bone completed healing to remove the strain from the surrounding muscles and tendons. Hospital Regulations during peace time made it so a non-life threatening injury would be healed to the point the shinobi could complete their usual mission load – though in the case of genin only to the point that they learned from their mistakes early on in their career. Typically, it meant a cast and restrictions on training and mission load.

"Sure. I know adults." Sasuke didn't know adults beyond Iruka and Kakashi and neither was available at the moment.

"It'll be ok. My parents can help out." Sasuke was not staying in Sakura's house because she was pretty sure that would mean Naruto would be staying in her house and she hadn't had time to make her house Sasuke-proof so he didn't see anything embarrassing. But all ninja worth their salt knew how to lie when needed.

The medic, who didn't really have a way to hold Sasuke in the hospital, relented and sent the team off with strict instructions. She had no doubt that they would be back and that they would not listen to her recommendations.

* * *

The next day Sasuke was kept home from mission work and Sakura and Naruto were put on a multi-team squad to continue surveying the sewer system. Team Gai was a terror. First there was the boy in green with the eyebrows who talked louder than Naruto, then the Hyuuga with a stick so far up his ass it could scratch his brain, and finally the girl who seemed to roll with the punches before hitting back twice as hard. Actually she was pretty cool.

Pakkun took one look at the green clad boy and wished he could leave – he felt bad for Sasuke getting hurt on his watch and wasn't about to leave these idiots up to their own devices again. Naruto immediately set out to make enemies with Hyuuga Neji, smelling a pompous brat a mile away. Sakura could only hope that this mission cleared without any more trips to the hospital.

Tenten was remarkably well adjusted for all her teammates' quirks and easily took the lead on the mission. She smiled at Sakura when she introduced herself and causally told Sakura that she looked forward to working together even if it was in a sewer. Sakura was struck by the professionalism and class the older girl possessed and decided then and there she would do everything in her power to get more missions with team Gai in the future.

Not even Rock Lee waxing poetic about her pink hair and beauty – or something about blossoms and youth she assumed it meant beauty – made her think twice about that personal vow. Female solidarity was sacred and Tenten had earned it.

The actual excursion into the sewer went off much better than the day before. Neji did, however, end up mocking Naruto for not being able to walk on the walls yet and Lee came to his rescue before Naruto tried to deck the bastard.

"Fear not, Naruto! I too cannot yet walk on walls but with due diligence to our training we will be able to achieve it soon enough!" This was punctuated with a clenched fist and a sparkly grin.

Naruto, unnerved by the enthusiasm and delighted by the camaraderie, shouted out his own agreement and went back to attempting wall climbing. Neji scoffed and continued on at a safe height, out of reach from the bright boys.

"Is he always like that?" Sakura asked. Maybe two loud preteens would cancel each other out?

"Sometimes he's worse. What about yours?" Tenten cheerfully replied. Her team was weird, she was used to it, and had come to see the ways that could be used to her own advantage in the field.

Sakura eyed Naruto as he shook a fist at Neji's back before charging head-first at a slime covered wall considered it. "About the same actually."

"Che. Figures you wouldn't be doing your job. Get back to work." Neji had passed by the girls and, ignoring the fact that his own teammate was standing around as well, had made direct eye contact with Sakura while he said that. He also gave her a once over and made no attempt to hide that he found something lacking.

Affronted, Sakura shook her own fist at the boy's back while Tenten snorted next to her. Pakkun sat on the ceiling and could only shake his head at baby ninja dynamics. They would probably never learn.

Elsewhere Sasuke practiced sticking his feet to his apartment wall while laying on the ground. It wasn't going great and he was going to need to make a trip to the store for spackle to fix a hole or three. He could probably blame it on Naruto. Or use something in all that shit Naruto had dumped in his apartment. Rolling over, Sasuke reached for the closest box. Time to find some secrets.

* * *

AN yeahhhh heres chapter 4! enjoy! and if you want i have a ko-fi account now ;) ko-fi [DOTcom BACKSLASH] behenna


End file.
